On the 3 Fundamental Needs We All Have


There has been a lot of science lately – e.g. Rick Hanson, PhD – behind the development of the three brains that human beings have. That’s right: Not one brain but three!

The oldest and least evolved part of the brain is the reptilian brain. It is responsible for the fight/flight/freeze response and is about survival.

The second evolved brain is the mammalian brain, which is all about touch and relationship.

The last part of the brain to evolve is related to our sense of who we are in the grand scheme of things. It is about the unique contribution only we can make.

What these three brains tell us is that all people have three fundamental needs that have to be addressed:

  1. Security
  2. Connection
  3. Meaning

How are we fulfilling these needs in our own lives and the lives of those around us?


Room For Everything


Human beings have a funny relationship to differences. As part of our wanting to make sense of the word, we attempt to fit (read: jam) phenomenon in the world outside into the categories and labels in our heads we use to make sense of the world. The thing is, no two people have the same set of categories and labels. Yet, we walk around, unconscious of the ways in which we take those cognitive differences for granted. We forget that we have different perspectives on family, work, communication, conflict, the role of government in the lives of private citizens, etc. And then, in our forgetting, we end up arguing, trying to jam the other person’s perspective to fit our own.

In remembering these differences, we begin to see the beauty of the diversity around us. We begin to get that life would be pretty boring if we all thought the exact same way. When we begin to see that the differences do not threaten us, but rather can deepen our capacity to love by expanding ourselves and our world, we discover that there is, in fact, room for everything. …