On the Nature of Recovery

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Today, I dragged myself to the “Heart of Recovery” Buddhist 12-Step group at the Berkeley Shambhala Center. I was resisting going, but with the encouragement of Jon, I just committed to showing up. I am glad that I went because I had a profound realization: I’ve been so focused on resisting and controlling my addiction that no energy was being devoted to my recovery. It was like I was in limbo in my war with myself.

In a text called Cool Water, by William Alexander, he talks about recovery as being a gift that is revealed to you. This made me think of all the ways I have expended energy on curbing my addiction rather than focusing that energy where it counts most: on my Self. I realized that recovery isn’t just about stopping an addiction. It’s about recovery of Self. It is about experiencing the same aliveness, clarity and vibrance inside of myself that I am beginning to experience without the haze of addiction.

All of a sudden, being in recovery wasn’t such a bad thing. In fact, it suddenly became a good lifelong process for recovering and awakening my Self. …

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One thought on “On the Nature of Recovery

  1. Steve

    I’ve been sober for 22 years now. Sometimes that sobriety was merely not taking a drink, one minute, one hour, one day at a time. Most of the time, however, life has been good. My life has been and continues to be better because I’m sober. Congratulations on your sobriety. Remember 2 things: alcoholism is merely a symptom, and life does get better.

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